Essay: End the Whispering Around Menopause

Illustration: © Innak | Dreamstime.com

I stopped having a period 3.5 yrs ago.

When I pick up my hormone patch at the pharmacy, a woman at the checkout who's around my age confirms the order by whispering "The patch?" And I reply in a normal voice, "Yes, the Estradiol."

Is this the menopausal equivalent of hiding menstrual products?

She could be protecting my privacy by not loudly announcing the medication I’m picking up but I have to wonder if I were picking up an inhaler for asthma if I’d get the whispering. And I doubt it.

Menopause is surrounded by enough silence, shame, and stigma as it is.

But we're whispering "The patch?" now like we used to hide menstrual products and the way television commercials for menstrual products for years used blue liquid as a stand-in for blood because God forbid any hint of what actually comes out of our bodies ruin an evening’s entertainment.

Is there anything about our bodies that isn't shame-ridden? It’s one of the reasons I enthusiastically edited the anthology Bloody Hell! Adventures in Menopause from Around the World, coming March 5 via Unbound.

Menopause is surrounded by enough silence, shame, and stigma as it is.

One of my favourite public menopause moments was a couple of years ago at a restaurant with a fireplace.

A woman came in with a friend and said loudly something like "Let's not sit near the fireplace. My hot flashes are hot enough."

Just like that. Yes. Thank you.